Six year old girl Wants Pancakes, forms grindcore band

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This initially appeared over on Reddit, and I in turn caught wind of this through MetalSucks. This is phenomenal. A six-year old girl called Joanna ‘Bologna’ Young and her dad Adam (aka ‘Blackula’) have posted up a grindcore song entitled ‘I Want Pancakes’ over on the old Soundcloud, and it freakin’ rules. She’s pretty good for her age. Her dad let her write the lyrics, and she sings on the track too. Its a real slammer,┬ácoming in at 76 seconds long and the vocal interplay between Joanna and her dad sounds excellent too. I would willingly pay money for this.

You can stream the track below. You will find your self rocking out to it, after which you almost certainly will want pancakes. Damn!

Peter Clegg

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Visions: Venom on Sky Monsters of Rock, 1985

Bands these days. So clean cut, not a hair out of place, wouldn’t say boo to a ghost. Heck, you might get the odd f-word here and the middle finger there, but only if they’re trying too hard to be bad ass.

Things were a lot different back in 1985, when Geordie black metal pioneers Venom rolled onto the set of the Sky Monsters of Rock Show. For anyone who hasn’t seen it, fan or not, this is a must see. Prepare yourself for one of the most hilarious interviews ever as host Amanda Reddington quickly loses control of the set, as Cronos, Mantas and Abaddon overwhelm her and the show with their sheer buffoonery. Sure they had a whole Satan shtick going on, but that didn’t stop them from being three lads from Newcastle-upon-Tyne out to have a laugh. It seems like this was a lab explosion waiting to happen. Proof that the 80’s was possibly music’s greatest time ever, rich was its diversity and evolution. There’ll never be another band like Venom wreaking havoc in quite the same fashion.

But enough lamenting the downfall of the mainstream public’s tastes, enjoy some proper telly gold!

Peter Clegg

Bill Bailey – In Metal

Bill Bailey
In Metal

The world would certainly be a poorer and gloomier place without Bill Bailey. The self styled Part Troll has been splitting sides for years with his rambling style of comedy, mixed with warped musical renditions of the Hokey Cokey and the BBC News theme of all things.

But though he’s more well known to the wider public for Never Mind The Buzzcocks and his role as Manny in Black Books’, he’s had plenty of musical dabblings as well, least of all the excellent ‘Insect Nation’. And here he bestows ‘In Metal’, an album of metal-styled songs based on his Sonisphere Festival performance earlier in the year.

There’s not much I can say without giving too much away, cos the humour is part of its charm of course. Don’t expect full on metal – if anything there’s its more rock, with the odd metal styling thrown in. That said though, the Rammstein version of ‘Scarborough Fair’, as well as a welcome ‘metal version’ of ‘Das Hokey Cokey’ show a little bit of steel, although they’re more laden with synth, and the heaviest it gets, on , is ruined by a lyric that quickly becomes tired. The best moments are the tracks ‘Leg of Time’ and ‘Love Song’, which are genuinely hilarious at times and have exactly the direct effect.

I suspect hardcore Bailey fans will find more to enjoy about his sending up of metal than the casual fan or listener, and its not as though he needed to do this to further his wildly successful career. But for the most part its an enjoyable diversion from the often too serious world of heavy metal, and surely that’s what ‘In Metal’ is all about and nothing more?

Peter Clegg

Buy ‘In Metal‘ here

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